Gran Colombian News, 1919

[The Rock Doctor]

15 January 1919:  Cartagena

"Oh", Rey Alizandro remarked, reading through his daily briefing notes at the breakfast table.  "The Carpenter died."

"Who's that, Papa?", Rosa Alizandro asked.

"Ah...somebody who used to work for me", Rey replied, conscious of his wife's gaze.

"Is it the man who put the bay window onto my bedrom?  Because he was very nice", Rosa added, "And he seemed too young to be dead now."

"Er, no, this was a different carpenter, doing some work for me in Cuba", Rey said.  "You've never met him."

"Are we going to go to his funeral?"

"Actually, we're going to go get washed up", Senora Alizandro interjected, much to Rey's relief.  "Come on", she said, gesturing to the girls.  They followed her out of the kitchen, and Rey went back to reading.

"What was this carpenter doing?", Jose asked.

Rey looked back up.  "You didn't go with your mother?"

"I'm almost nineteen, Papa.  I think Mama trusts me to wash myself", Jose replied.  "Who was he?"

Rey leaned forward.  "Do you really want to know the answer to that?"

"You keep telling me I need to learn things if I'm going to succeed you.  Educate me", Jose replied.

"Very well", Rey said, setting down the notes.  "The Carpenter was a mass murderer.  He would abduct poor or homeless people from eastern Cuba and torture them to death with carpentry tools such as hammers, saws, and vices.  When we acquired Cuba and learned of him, I had Internal Security put him to work as an interrogator.  He was very effective at cracking foreign spies and saboteurs, such as Anahuac pirates."

"That's disgusting", Jose said.

"That's life", Rey responded.  "We found a way to make a criminal a productive part of the nation."

"You sanctioned torture, Papa.  How do you live with that?"

"Just fine, thank you", the President snapped.  "You think we gave him innocents?  No, we gave him people who would gladly have done the same things back to us.  Did you want us to just put them in a cell and leave them alone so their friends could skin and mutilate our countrymen in the name of their fake god?"

"There has to be a better way than that", Jose retorted.

"Well there isn't", Rey replied.  "This conversation is over.  Go wash up."


7 February 1919:  Colon

The electric lights were starting to come on in Colon as the sun continued its slow plunge into the Darien Isthmus.  The Libertad was anchored in the roadstead, near the entrance to the Canal, through which she would make a priority transit in the morning before heading down to Esmerldas.

Aboard the Libertad, President Alizandro and his Cabinet were having drinks in the main meeting room, while their spouses were back aft around the pool.  Carla Davalo's husband Miguel, the only male amongst the spouses, had briefly mingled with the ladies before retiring to the library.  

A rap on the door was followed by the unexpected appearance of the ship's captain, who said, "Senor President?  Pardon my interruption, but we received a message from Cartagena for you."

He handed a folded slip of paper to Rey, who said, "Thank you, Capitan."  With that, the officer departed, and Rey flipped the sheet open as the Ministers watched and waited.

"Oh, okay.  There was a large explosion in a coastal town in Romania.  Sank their battleship and apparently killed their king.  Some of the European powers are starting to provide aid."

"Sank their battleship and killed the king?  Bloody bad luck there", Nicholas Benson mused.

"Didn't he just take the throne recently?", Rey asked.

"Three years ago, I believe", Eduard Torres said.  The elder statesman was seated, drinking water rather than booze.

"Who's next in line?"

"He has a sister, but I know literally nothing else about her.  I can direct our ambassador in Vienna to attend the funeral and coronation."

"We should do that", Rey agreed.  

"Did you want to assign some aid?", Torres inquired.

"Mmm...no.  It'll take weeks to get there in the best case - anybody in need of urgent care will be dead by then, and there'll be European do-gooders crawling all over the place.  We'll just look like Juanito-Come-Lately", Rey replied.  "Incidently - who would you expect to actually send help?"

"The French and/or the Green Cross would.  The Bavarians, Confederation, and Dutch might.  I understand Italy has a purpose-built hospital ship, which would be useful in such a situation."

"Do we have a hospital ship?", Rey asked.

"No", Defence Minister Edmund Fitzroy said.

"Why not?"

"It's never been approved in the Main Estimates", Sir Edmund replied neutrally.  "This very ship is intended to function as such in wartime, but it would take weeks to prepare it for such purposes."

"So if, say, Ciudad Jorge blows up tomorrow, we've got nothing we can do?"

"We can send in the Ejercito or the Marinos.  The former have field hospitals."

Rey pursed his lips.  "Perhaps we need to think about a hospital ship.  Or two.  One for each coast."

"A thought, Senor President?", Aquileo Alizandro interjected.  

"Fire away."

"Hospital ships are useful, but there are other things to consider in disaster relief - supply of food, water, and shelter, equipment for moving rubble, and so forth.  Perhaps a hospital ship, paired with...call it a relief operations ship...could be a more effective pairing than two hospital ships."

"Well - Edmund, I'll ask you to have the Armada prepare some ideas for my review."

"Yes, Senor President."

[The Rock Doctor]

8 February 1919:  South of San Miguelito

"So you're telling me that the French dredging ship exploded?", President Alizandro asked.

"Correct", Benicio Delgado confirmed.

"Why?"

"Well, I'm not certain about the why, but what exploded appears to have been her magazine.  Remember, this is an old battleship with dredging equipment installed.  Apparently, the French made it a habit to keep her fully stocked with ammunition."

"That seems rather peculiar", Rey remarked.  "Are you sure this is legitimate news?  Because I'm starting to wonder if there is something more at play.  Remember the Romanians were having trouble with Communists - is it possible that the explosion at Varna, and now this incident, are in fact a cover story for an insurrection of some sort?"

"I can have our people in Vienna dispatch an investigator", Delgado said neutrally.

[The Rock Doctor]

13 February 1919:  Cartagena

"I've had enough of arguing with you about how I do my job", Rey Alizandro said to his son Jose. The two of them, along with Senora Alizandro, were seated at the dinner table.  "Your mother and I have discussed the matter, and we agree the fundamental problem is that you've been too sheltered in recent years.  You don't know how the world works, what normal people are like."

Jose glanced over at his mother, who said nothing.

"This will lead to disaster when you become President, as one day you will", Rey continued.  "Your naivety will cost the nation dearly, because you won't understand what bastards your international counterparts are and the kind of shit they are willing to sling or swallow in order to get what they want.  Nor will you be willing to stoop to their level to get what Gran Colombia needs."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence", Jose replied.

"Your attitude isn't helpful either", Rey said.  "Nobody likes a brat." 

"You're calling-"

"Quiet.  I'm not done", Rey cut off his son.  "There's one simple approach to this problem, one I know worked for my cousin.  You're going to enroll in the Ejercito."

Jose laughed nervously.  "Nonsense.  Papa, I'm an adult.  I make my own decisions."

"Jose, I'm the President.  You make your decisions when I let you, and I make them when I feel it necessary for the national interest", Rey said.  "The paperwork is already being processed, and your orders are being cut.  You're going to Bogota for qualifications, and you'll be onto the Academy after you pass the entry tests.  You leave tomorrow."

"You can't do this", Jose said, a little desperately.  His father merely glared at him.  "Mama, he can't do this."

"It's for your own good", his mother said through clenched teeth.

"What if I refuse to go?"

"I will have you dragged out in shackles if I have to", Rey said.  "I'm not fucking around, son.  This is going to happen, so the best option you have is to man up and accept it."

Jose stared at his father, his face flushing.  Finally, he said, "I guess I have no choice, then.  And if I turn out like Aquileo, it'll be a fair improvement over turning out like you."  He pushed his chair back and strode out of the room.

As the teenager's footfalls echoed away, Rey exhaled.  "Well, that wasn't so bad.  I half-thought he'd call my bluff."  He looked over to his wife as she dabbed at her eyes with a kerchief.  "You okay?"

"Rey", she replied softly.  "So help me God:  If my little boy gets hurt because of this, I will feed you your balls."  With that, she slid out of her chair and left the President alone in the dining room.

[Guinness]

Why not the Armada? He'd certainly see the world cruising aboard Warrior...

Or are you planning to send him to the Congo?  :-X

[The Rock Doctor]

Internal logic - the army's probably viewed as harder, and thus better for character building.

Not sure where he'll wind up.  I was giving thought to enrolling him in the AFL, but Borys' service terms seem too long.

[Sachmle]

Internal logic - the army's probably viewed as harder, and thus better for character building.

Not sure where he'll wind up.  I was giving thought to enrolling him in the AFL, but Borys' service terms seem too long.

That an the likelihood of El Jefe eating his own 'mountain oysters' increases exponentially if Jr's in the AFL, what with the Hapsburgers.

[The Rock Doctor]

I admit I was intrigued at the thought of leaving the Presumed Successor in the care of the Blood God...

[Carthaginian]

Whew... El JJ is in the army now!
Hope no tragic training accidents befall him.

Sr. Rey might want to start making a spare soon... lotsa dangerous things can happen during training. ;)

[Sachmle]

Yeah, and IF something does happen he won't be making any more spares later.  ;)

[Desertfox]

He can always join the Swiss Foreign Battalion, or Von Rosen's Battalion, or Taugon's Thoughs, or...  ;)

[The Rock Doctor]

17 March 1919:  Cartagena/Bogota

The telephone line between the capital and Bogota was quite scratchy, but given that the alternative was a day long train trip or an exchange of letters, Aquileo Alizandro was prepared to deal with it.  "I have the General on the line now, Sir", the operator reported. 

"Thank you", the Minister of Finance replied.  The operator rang off, leaving him with the General.  "Hello, Sir - thank you for taking the time to speak with me."

"Always a pleasure, Capitan", General Marcio Sotomayer replied faintly.  "To what do I owe the honor?"

"I'm just a nosy relative looking for information, General", Aquileo said.

"That's what I suspected", the General remarked - followed by a worrisome sigh.

"I'm not sure I like the sound of that, Sir", Aquileo observed, "But yes, I'm curious to see how my young cousin fared in basic training and the qualification exams."

"Not so well", the General stated.  "He passed introductory training - barely.  He is, to be blunt, not in good physical condition.  His attitude isn't great, either.  More to the point, he failed his qualification exams for the Academy."

Aquileo growled.  "How badly?"

"Too badly for it to have been an accident.  Your cousin must have chosen to fail the exam intentionally."  Aquileo slapped his forehead with the palm of his free hand, then shook his head.  "So, the result is that he will continue training as an enlisted man."

"His father isn't going to be happy about that", Aquileo observed.

"I imagine - but it would be difficult to justify re-trying him."

"No, no - if he failed, he failed", Aquileo said.  "I'm just saying - the President will be grouchy.  I don't expect him to intervene in any fashion, nor would I support him doing so."

"That's reassuring", Sotomayer said. 

"Still...", Aquileo said, "My cousin will one day become the President of the Republic."

"I'm quite cognizant of that, Capitan", Sotomayer confirmed.  "As the President undoubtedly knew, there is much the Ejercito can teach young Jose.  It still can - it just won't be done in the same way as might have been expected.  "I'm looking for possible deployment opportunities for him after he completes the infantryman's course.  I'll let you know what I decide, if you'd like."

"I would appreciate that, General", Aquileo said. 

[Carthaginian]

So, el JJ gets to work for a living.
This is starting to look more and more interesting by the minute.
Hopefully this weekend- when I am less sleep deprived and more inspired- President Hoover can get up to some equally interesting antics.

[The Rock Doctor]

I got the impression Mr. Hoover already was up to something interesting...

But yes, young Jose should have an interesting six years ahead of him.

[TexanCowboy]

Send him to the Romanian Green Berets.....

Jumping out of airplanes, doing other ridiculous stuff, and all commanded by a 18 year old princess.  ;D

Seriously, though, the offers open.

[The Rock Doctor]

I don't have a lot of reason to think that would be such a good idea.